Polyamory is a Living, Breathing Yoga Practice

The Connection of Yoga & Polyamory

Yea I fkn said it. Polyamory isn't an extended dating pool or a recipe for "having your cake and eating it too." For a lot of us, it’s the most demanding yoga practice we will ever undertake. And if that statement makes you roll your eyes, good. Stick around.

I'm Javi, a Yoga Therapist, and I’m not talking about gentle stretching or scented candles. I’m talking about discipline, spiritual heat (Tapas), and the radical self-study that happens when your ego is on fire.

Most people hear "polyamory" and think about love or sex. I hear it and think about truth-telling, letting go of possession, and radical compassion. This is where the real practice starts—right where your comfort ends.

The Monogamy Myth: Ownership vs. Freedom

I was raised in a world that sold a specific, narrow vision of love: Monogamy as Virtue. It taught me that possessiveness was proof you cared, and jealousy was the noble price of intimacy.

But those are the stories of ownership, not of freedom.

The core lesson of yoga—the one that transcends the mat—is that real love is not about ownership. Real freedom demands a profound, often painful, level of discipline. Polyamory is the ultimate crucible for confronting this. It’s a living practice that drags all your "un-yogic" sh*t to the surface and dares you to look it in the eye.

Yamas & Niyamas: The Original Relationship Rules

The ethical guidelines of yoga—the Yamas (external restraints) and Niyamas (internal observances)—are often quoted in class, but they hit different when applied to a tangled, multi-partner relationship structure. This is where theory gives way to sweat, confusion, and real growth.

The Yamas in Polyamory (How We Interact)

Yama	Concept	The Polyamory Challenge
Satya	Truthfulness	Can you tell your partner(s) your full, honest truth about your feelings, fears, or desires—even when it means a painful or difficult conversation?
Aparigraha	Non-Possessiveness	Can you love someone deeply without the need to own their time, choices, or affections? This is the daily practice of releasing clinging.
Ahimsa	Non-Harming	Can you hold your own firm boundaries and honor someone else’s, even when it means you feel temporary pain or disappointment?

The Niyamas in Polyamory (How We Treat Ourselves)

Niyama	Concept	The Polyamory Challenge
Svadhyaya	Self-Study	When jealousy flares, are you willing to get uncomfortably honest about its root—is it truly about your partner, or is it an old wound, insecurity, or shadow?
Santosha	Contentment	Can you find peace and satisfaction in your enoughness? Can you practice genuine joy (compersion) for a partner's connection, without needing to control, chase, or constantly compare?

Applying these principles when your heart is tangled up in multiple dynamics, when you are holding space for both immense joy and stinging jealousy, that’s not just relationship management—that is Tapas. That is the spiritual fire that burns away illusion.

Why Polyamory is the Funhouse Mirror

It's easy to talk a good game about yoga when you’re solo, centered, and quiet on your mat.

It is exponentially harder when your partner is on a date, when a boundary has been crossed, or when a wave of unexpected insecurity washes over you. That is where your actual practice begins.

Every relationship is a mirror, but polyamory is a damn funhouse. It distorts, amplifies, and reveals your sh*t in high definition. It forces you to witness your desires without judgment, speak your needs without shame, and show up with a level of courage and vulnerability most folks never touch.

This is the work. This is the radical honesty that leads to real, lasting healing. And that is why I keep showing up—on my mat, and in my messy, beautiful, boundary-pushing relationships.

Ready to practice with me?

Reflection Prompt:

Where in your current relationship dynamics (monogamous, poly, friendship, or professional) are you being invited to practice the Yamas & Niyamas for real—not just as a concept, but as a lived experience? What is the edge you are currently choosing to run from?

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